Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Do you know a tool?

I have decided to come up with a list of signs that you or someone you know is a tool. It can sometimes be a disease, and if you do know someone like this-please help them:

They wear tank tops:

Now there are exceptions as to when this attire is acceptable: gym and beach. Please don't rock them as a fashion accessory. I understand you want to show off your bulging muscles but, the cons outweigh the pros.

They carry jugs of water as if it is a water bottle:
I understand you wanted to stay hydrated before and after your 3 hour gym sesh's, but really across campus? You look like a fool.

3 in diameter faced watches:
I am not dissing a male who wears a watch, quite frankly I think it's hot. But if it is big enough for me to read the time from across the room, its time to downsize. We all know the purpose of your ownership is to show how much money you have....we aren't dumb.

Wearing these:
Now I don't have a problem if you wear these, but when you wear them with mid length socks and basketball shorts/sweats.....really? It screams "yeah I'm too cool for real shoes"
You're not.

Sunglasses inside:

It does not make you cool. Just because you have a deep down desire to be Mike "the Situation" please don't profess it to the world. Are you too cool to make eye contact with everyone else in the room?

These are just a few physical signs. These are usually the first to be noticed. So if you or someone you know do several of these toolish qualities, I beg you change or help someone else change, for the betterment of society!


  1. Ha ha hilarious! But to be honest, I kind of want to carry a jug of water. Because then I would want to drink it so it is not so heavy anymore = i end up drinking more water. But I will refrain :)

  2. It mostly applies to boys, I have never actually seen a girl carry a jug around! haha

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